The Secrets That We Keep
by xTamarax
Summary: [Part III: Fall Apart, Then Start Again] For him it was far from over.
1. Default Chapter

Title: (Series) The Secrets That We Keep- Unsung (Part I?)

Author: Tamara

Summary: Grace enters into a secretive, self-destructive relationship with Eli.

Rating: PG-13 for a few choice words, and perhaps some sexuality.

Pairing(s): Grace/Eli, and mentions of Eli/Carla

Warnings: While this is a Grace/Eli pairing it's not exactly a happy little "they are so in love" fic. Angst is to be expected along with drama and whatever else my twisted little brain decides to add. Also this is told in no set P.O.V so forgive me if I somehow confuse you. Oh, and the italics are flashbacks.

Distribution: Anywhere else: Want, Ask, Have (with my name of course)

Feedback: Please. It's the only way for to me even consider making this a long series, or perhaps a long story.

Storylines: "The Second Time Around" with a few exceptions: (1) Lily and Rick didn't go thru with the wedding, but are still living together. (2) Carla is gone and did write the letter to Grace.

Sorry if this sucks.

_**The Secrets That We Keep- Unsung**_

"_I wait for the words on the tip of your tongue_

_I'm only as good as the last one_

_Well you decide and I abide as my song goes unsung_

_Things are going crazy and I'm not sure who to blame_

_Everything is changing and I do not feel the same_

_I'm slippin' thru the cracks of floors that I thought were strong_

_I'm trying to find a place where I can feel like I belong_

_Well, I am cryin'_

_You aren't tryin'_

_I am melting away…"_

_- "Unsung" by Vanessa Carlton._

The rising dawn shed light through the tiny spaces between the blinds into the dark room. It's not that bright, but just enough to cause me squint my eyes and groan as I am awoken. My body is sore and tired, but I manage to cause myself to sit up and glance at the alarm clock on my right. _6:57 a.m. _Inwardly I suppress a groan, and out of my modesty I adjust the flimsy sheet covering my body that was starting to slip. I look to my left and there he was in all his glory, as he sleeps, naked too of course. Instantly I'm reminded of his words from a conversation we had weeks ago:

"_After what we just did, you have no reason to be so modest, Grace," he spoke referring to me trying to cover myself up._

I remember feeling so dirty after his words. _After what we just did. _

I won't lie and say that I don't enjoy what we do, but afterwards I belittle and curse myself. I'm having sex with a guy who will be my stepbrother. I'm having sex with a guy who I have absolutely no relationship with besides a fragile friendship. Basically we're fuck buddies. Oh yeah, and not to mention that I lost my virginity to him…the same night our parents were supposed to be married.

"_Hey Grace. Lily and Dad are going to the airport to drop your Grandma off, and then to dinner. I'm going to mom's and Zoë is going to your Dad's. She wants to know if you want to go too."_

_I glance over the banister and see Eli get up off the couch and head towards the garage. I know he tries to hide how he feels but I know he's upset about the letter. And I blame myself. I should have just told him. He says he needs to be alone right now, but I doubted that was a good idea. I had to talk to him about Carla, the letter, and our almost kiss. Things are so screwed up. _

_I stopped watching him and looked backed to Jessie, who looked rather annoyed. Oops, she was waiting for a response._

"_Um, you know I think I'm just going to stay here tonight. Thanks, Jessie."_

_I start to head downstairs but she grabs me._

"_I don't know what the hell is going on between you two and what I walked in on, but just let it go. For his sake, for yours, and for the rest of us," she warned me and actually looked rather angry. Then again, we never really got along, and I sense that she knows how I feel about her older brother. I actually don't know what to say. Nothing was going on, but something was at the same time. My best bet was probably just to try and put her mind at ease._

"_Jess, it was nothing really. He was just upset." That wasn't exactly a lie, but she wasn't buying it._

"_Whatever Grace. I know what I saw. Just leave him alone. Even if there was a chance at something happening between you two, it wouldn't be smart. Things are already to complicated," she warned. _

_In the back of my mind I want to speak out and assure her nothing is going on, but I'm pretty sure it would be just to convince myself more so than her. Denial. It just made it easier. But I let it go, knowing she's right. She walks away, and I can't help but wonder what the hell I am going to say, and whether or not I should leave him alone._

_Then minutes later I found myself, standing at his door. He opens it, and he's standing there shirtless, and his eyes completely bloodshot. He had been crying. Eli Sammler was crying. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. _

"_Um, hey. I was just coming to see how you were doing. And I was hoping we could talk," I stated, my voice uneasy at the sight of him. I could feel his eyes on me, and I look to the floor. I suddenly felt self-conscious in front of him._

"_But uh, you probably want to be alone, so I'll just go," and I turned around and headed through the doorway, when suddenly a shock of electricity was sent through my body. His fingertips on my skin. He held his hand around my arm._

"_No it's ok . Stay. Please," he asked quietly and almost as if he was begging. I had never heard him so vulnerable, so hurt. And I was weak when it came to him. So I did stay, and walked back into his room and he shut the door behind him._

"_I'm so sorry I didn't tell you, Eli," I said suddenly, almost random. He just smiled slightly._

"_Don't be Grace. It's not your fault. I know you were just trying to protect me."_

"_You're not mad?" I asked incredulous that he didn't hold any contempt for me._

"_A part of me wishes you would I have told me, because -"_

"_I should have, as your friend."_

"_You didn't let me finish. I wish you would have told me, because there was this part of me that hoped and believed she would come back to me. I mean she meant so much to me, that I was so sure that she felt the same. Obviously I was wrong," he explain, the bitterness sounding in last words. "But I know your intentions were good Grace, but now I can finally let go. At least I hope I can."_

_I nodded my to show I understood. "That makes complete sense. I just don't get how she-" suddenly I stopped myself aware of what I was about to say. He was now leaning against his dresser, and I sat on the edge of his bed facing him. My God this was pure torture. I'm a glutton for punishment._

_I looked up at him and his eyebrows raised in question. I had sparked his interest. Not a good thing._

"_You don't get how she could what Grace? Go on"  
_

_Our eyes locked, and I could feel him searching for the answers to what I was really going to say. I couldn't tell him. Jessie's words hit me, and I knew that she was right. I can't pursue anything, if anything is even there at all. I could feel my nerves inside start to quaver , and my stomach was in knots. I had to leave, now._

"_Nevermind. I should go," I said as I brought myself to my feet, but once again there he was stopping me. _

_His warm fingers were wrapped around my wrist, and my pulse was racing. _

"_Finish what you were going to say," he commanded me, and his hazel eyes were boring into my soul. What the hell am I going to do?. Every second I felt myself growing more and more submissive to him. I know I am going to regret this, but I did it anyways. Like I said I was a glutton for punishment._

"_I don't get how she could leave you. How she could just walk out on you, and not give a damn. You everything I could- I mean anyone- could ever want. You're better than that. Damn her," the words gushed from my mouth before I could even think about what I was saying. I prayed he hadn't heard my confession, or he just let it go. One look said it all. Fuck. Nice going Gracie. I waited for him to say something, anything. _

_Silence._

_Before I knew it he had pulled me too him and his lips came crashing down on mine. He parted my lips with his tongue, and explored my mouth. God he tasted good. I was melting inside. This was everything I had ever wanted, but deep inside I knew this didn't mean anything to him. He wanted Carla, not me. That realization cut me like a knife. I pulled away, saying nothing at all. My fingertips flew to my flushed, burning lips._

_Too many emotions were consuming me and I felt the tears inside start to swell up. I glanced up at him through my eyelashes. This was all too much. I was about to say I was sorry when he pulled me closer to him again and whispered 4 words:_

"_Grace, I need you."_

_Shit, he had me._

Needless to say the next thing I knew I woke up completely naked cradled against his warm, luscious body. That's how it started. Somehow we remained friends while have a sexual relationship. That was until a three weeks ago. My feelings for him were more intense than ever, and I knew I was in love with him. One statement from his ripped my heart out.

"_I don't believe in love anymore. It doesn't exist."_

I should have called this thing, or whatever it is, off then. I was only going to get hurt. Early on we had defined our sexual relationship as just sex, nothing more. And now more than ever, I wished I hadn't gotten myself into this disaster. I was dying inside. I wanted to tell him so badly I loved him, but I know he would shun me and that would be the end of anything, even our friendship.

Day after day, I see girls flirt with him at the bookstore or the mall or wherever, and he flirts back. I know he dates other girls, and I've seen him make out with someone who wasn't me. It makes me jealous and it kills me inside. Yeah there's two words for me. _Stupid and masochist. _

I hate myself for what I'm doing to myself. I only stay because I love him, and without him I would be empty.

I had out my clothes on and I head towards the door, but not without looking back at him.

He doesn't love me. He just uses me for sex. I feel dirty, but I don't care anymore. He's the only guy who even looks at me as more than just a smart girl. Being with him is all I ever wanted, and if sex is the only way he'll have me, then no matter how horrible it sounds, I'll take it. Because for now he's all that I have.

-END-

Ok a few side notes:

While most of you are going to kill me because of how "weak" I made Grace, or that Eli and Grace aren't in an actual relationship, or that it seems like Eli is purely using Grace for sex, have no worries. Not all is as it seems. I am an avid E/G 'shipper. This is part one of a series. I have a lot planned grins evilly and no this is not going to be one of those happily ever after stories, at least not right away. But that's what makes writing this so fun.

I'm sorry is this sucked, I haven't written in well over a year, and I wanted to try something different.

Thanks for taking the time to actually read this, and remember feedback is the only way I will continue.


	2. Part II And It All Comes Crashing Down

Title: (Series) The Secrets That We Keep- And It All Comes Crashing Down (Part II)

Author: Tamara

Summary: Grace and Eli's "relationship" unravels.

Rating: PG-13

Pairing(s): Eli/Grace, Grace?

Distribution: Anywhere else- Want. Ask. Take.

Feedback: Please. It's my only inspiration for continuing.

Storylines: After (Part I) "Unsung" and during "Tough Love."

_**The Secrets That We Keep- And It All Comes Crashing Down**_

"_Every time I feel alone, _

_I can blame it on you,_

_And I do_

_You got me like a loaded gun,_

_Golden sun and sky so blue_

_We both know that we want it,_

_But we both know that you left me no choice_

_(Chaque fois qu tu t'en vas)_

_You just bring me down_

_(Je pr©tends que tout va bien)_

_So I'm counting the tears 'til I get over you_

_Sometimes I watch the world go by  
I wonder what it's like  
To wake up every single day  
Smile on your face  
You never tried  
We both know we can't change it  
But we both know we'll just have to face it_

_(Chaque fois qu tu t'en vas)_

_You just bring me down_

_(Je pr©tends que tout va bien)_

_So I'm counting the tears 'til I get over you…"_

_- "Til I Get Over You"- Michelle Branch_

She sat at her vanity mirror, starring at her reflection and bracing herself for the upcoming performance. "_This is it," she told herself. Do it for _him_." _

"_Do it once more. Do it for me."_

She let out a deep breathe, and heard a small giggle come from behind her. She looked up into the brightly lit mirror to see Tad standing behind her, grinning, and looking amused.

"Why is Grace Manning actually nervous?" he asked almost mockingly.

"Shut up," she retorted with spite.

He put up his hand in mock surrender and started to back away. "I'm sorry. Didn't know you were so touchy. I was only playing around. But yeah, um, good luck. You'll do great. You have been great through this whole thing. See you out there," he finished and started to walk away.

"Tad, wait," Grace started at feeling some relief from his kind words, and feeling guilty at her behavior. That was the last thing she expected him to say to her. He paused in his footsteps and looked over his shoulder.

"What?"

"Um, thanks. I'm sorry I was such a bitch, it's just been a stressful month…"

"Enough said. Apology accepted and your welcome," he said and flashed a smile at her. She smiled back and turned back around to her mirror to do a final make-up check. He stood there and took a deep breath.

"Grace, I was thinking maybe afterwards we could go get something to eat or some coffee or something."

She froze in silence. Tad was asking her out? Well not like a date or anything, but still. She thought he only considered her a friend, and nothing potentially more. Besides there was always the Eli issue. Then again it's not like they were an actual couple. If he could see other people than so could she. Not to mention, even if he could seem like an ass, Tad was really cute…

"I'll take that as a no," he said responding to her silence and hesitance to answer. "oh well, thought I would give it a shot."

"Oh no Tad, I um, it's the cast party. The cast party is tonight. But I'd like to some other time," Grace reminded him and the look of disappointment was shed from his handsome face.

"Ok, perhaps I can give you a ride to your house then?"

"Maybe," was her answer and she left it at that.

Grace glanced down at her watch. 5 minutes until show time. She took one final look and closed her eyes tight and drew a deep breath. It still didn't help the butterflies in her stomach. Why the hell was she doing this? Oh yeah that's right. Eli. Grace decided to take a little peek and see where he was sitting. She moved her way to the curtain, and opened it a tiny bit. She spotted her mom, but suddenly there was an empty feeling in the pit of her stomach. He wasn't there. She scanned the entire auditorium in search of Eli, but no luck. He wasn't there. Grace told herself that maybe he was just late.

She closed the curtain and walked backstage. 1 minute to go, and he still wasn't there. _He promised. He'll be here. _She told herself the same thing for the next minute. But somewhere deep inside of herself, she knew she had set herself up for a fall.

a

a

a

a

She rested her forearms on the kitchen counter and buried her face in her hands. _Don't cry, Grace. You already cried once. It isn't worth it. _Her eyes were still slightly red form the tears she had cried, and her throat was dry, and there was an ache inside of her heart she couldn't let go of. Grace sighed deeply, and opened the refrigerator door. She still couldn't believe that bitch had the audacity to show up here tonight. At least she knew what he had really been up to, and if he tried to lie she could call him on it. She needed a drink.

Orange juice? No. Soda? No. Then something caught her eye. _"Why the hell not?" _she thought. She looked behind her to make sure no one was looking, and when she saw there wasn't she grabbed the bottle of wine, and began filling the red plastic cup with the dark red liquid.

"I really don't think you should be doing that" a voice echoed through the air.

Her body tensed upon recognition of the voice. She continued filling the cup anyways. When she was done she put the bottle back in it's exact place and turned around, her eyes holding an icy glare to the. She was pissed. How dare he.

"And I really don't know what the hell makes you think you have the right to tell me what I should or shouldn't do, let alone talk to me," she retorted harshly, and raised the cup to her lips and took a sip. She never really drank before and the alcohol caused a slight burning sensation as it went down. And she liked it.

"Grace please let me explain, let me apologize, " he pleaded with her. He had never seen her like this. This angry, this cold, this distant, this hurt.

"No. you don't need to explain. I understand everything. And I should be the one apologizing. I'm sorry…for believing you cared about me and that I could count on you. I'm sorry for being naïve," she told him, and truth was she was sorry. She was sorry she let herself believe those things. Sorry for letting herself down.

Eli moved closer to her, his expression unreadable. He reached out to touch her. He had hurt her and he damned himself for it. He felt a pain shoot through his heart when she jerked further away from him, and stared at him almost cold and unfeeling. He saw it. He had pushed her too far away this time. Eli looked into the eyes that often lost him, and he realized she was gone. He clenches his fists to his sides, and could feel his muscles tighten and his stomach began to feel like a pit of nervousness and never ending despair.

Truth be told she was feeling to much. He had broken her heart. Not just tonight, but all the nights before where he held her afterwards, and kissed her passionately. All the times he told her she was beautiful, and more recently when he told her she was his. They were just words. And she knew that now. Some part of her hoped that he would change and see her, and she meant really she her inside and out, heart and soul. She had hoped the he would see what was right in front of him, but he never did. And tonight he proved that.

She knew what she had to do. For herself, for the sake of her sanity, and to prevent any further damage on her already bruised heart. She took a large sip, almost chugging the rest of the wine, and said what she didn't want to. The words killed her to say it.

"We're done," Grace said spitting out the words as if they were venom. She fought back the tears that were dwelling inside as she looked at the floor. She couldn't look at him. It hurt too much.

Eli swallowed hard at the lump in his throat, and felt like he was struggling to breathe. He couldn't lose her. He loved her, even if he never told her and didn't show her all the time. And now it hit him what a mistake that had been. No. It wasn't ending. He wouldn't accept that.

"Grace, look at me. _Please_," he pleaded as he stepped as close as he could be to her. His reached his hands out and placed her delicate face in his hands and forced her to look up at him. Her eyes were red, and her cheeks were stained with the silent tears she had cried. Her brown eyes met his hazel eyes and she placed her hands on his chest and pushed away from him as if touching him was an acid that burned through her skin.

"Get away from me, Eli. Just stay the hell away," she commanded as she furiously wiped away her tears.

"No. I can't. I won't. We need to talk about this," Eli spoke, his voice unstable as he choked back the tears he himself had been fighting. He had never felt this way about anyone, and he would be damned if he was going to let her get away.

Grace just shook her head and stayed silent. She didn't want to hear it. No excuses anymore. She had to get out of here and fast. Her feet began to move towards the direction of everyone else, but before she could get very far Eli's hand reached out and grasped her forearm forcing her to turn her head around and stop.

"Don't I get a say in this?" he questioned. Did it matter to her how he felt at all? He had to explain to her/

"Believe me, Eli, I know where you stand. Now let me go," she said as she jerked away from him again. A look of confusion spread across his face.

"What do you mean where I stand? What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Don't play dumb Eli. It's crystal clear what I mean to you. _Nothing_. The same as the girl I saw you making out with at the mall, and Celia."

Eli's face fell and he looked dumbstruck. "Celia? How-"

"The barrette, Eli. Jessie said it wasn't hers and _she_ showed up at the house looking for you and her precious barrette," Grace informed him, her voice dripping with anger and bitterness. The look on Eli's face said it all. He had been caught. Grace swore she saw guilt in his eyes and facial expression but she brushed it away. She was too angry. Too damn hurt to care about how he felt. She knew there had been other girls, but this had made it all too real. Real enough to knock Grace out of the fantasyland she was in and face reality.

"I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

"Save your apologies for when you actually mean them. I'm through. It's over. Now if you'll excuse me, I have somewhere to be." Grace pushed past him and was doing her best to conceal the look of hurt and anger on her face and prayed no one would notice she had been crying and upset. But before she could get far enough away, Eli practically yelled to her.

"Don't do this. I _need_ you." Grace halted in her tracks, and spun around quickly.

"Don't yell. Everyone will hear you. And you don't need me. You never did. What you needed was someone to keep your bed warm. So why don't you call Celia? I'm sure she'd be more than happy to fill that void. Now for the last time, would you please leave me the hell alone?"

"Grace, are you okay?" a new voice interrupted from behind her. She glanced behind her and saw Tad standing there, a look of concern across his handsome face. She smiled at him, and then panic struck her. How much had he heard?

"Um, I'm fine we were just discussing something."

"Oh. I heard some yelling, and I also noticed you were missing from the party," Tad explained to her and then he saw a clearly upset Eli standing on the other side of the kitchen. "Did I interrupt something?"

"Yes," Eli shot at him with anger. Who the hell did this kid think he was? And the way he was looking at Grace disturbed Eli. He knew that look. Tad liked her, and the very thought of someone else who wasn't him with Grace made him want to strangle the kid.

Grace shot Eli, who was glaring at Tad, a dirty look, and looked over at Tad. She knew she shouldn't do this, but Eli deserved some of his own medicine, even if it made her look petty and childish. Maybe Eli would see firsthand how she had felt at seeing him with all those other girls.

Grace looked at Tad, who was glaring back at Eli while generally confused as to why the hell Eli was made at him, and she smiled. "No you weren't interrupting anything. We were just having a petty little disagreement. Actually I was about to go look for you and see if you would like to dance with me. And them maybe we can go get that coffee we talked about." Grace knew it was unfair to Tad to use him like that to get back at Eli, but it wasn't as if she hadn't noticed Tad before. She thought he was cute, and he could be funny too, and was genuinely a nice guy. And besides, he liked her too.

"I'd love to dance with you, and go out after," Tad replied excited and somewhat surprised too. "Come on," he said as he grabbed her hand and pulled her behind him towards the living room. Grace willfully went and put a smile on her face, even though inside she felt anything but happy. She was dying inside, and her heart had shattered into a million pieces. She looked back to see Eli watching her walk away, tears falling down his face, and the expression on his face mirroring how she felt inside.

Eli stood there still trying to comprehend the whole situation, and when he did he wanted to die. He watched her walk away as he finally let the tears fall. He lost her, and it was all his own damn fault.

"I love you," he whispered into the air and she looked back and he could have sworn she saw him mouth those three small words that came way too late.

"…_We both know that I'm not over you…"_

_**End Part II**_

Well there's part 2. Not the best, but I couldn't keep all of you wonderful readers and reviewers for waiting. Hope you enjoyed this even though I was evil and broke up our favorite couple. But there's much more ahead. I have planned the next few parts in my head and there's a lot in store for each of them, but will they end up together? You never know laughs evilly. But if you guys want to throw some ideas out at me, feel free to do so. I love suggestions.

Please don't forget to review!


	3. Part III Fall Apart, Then Start Again

Title: (Series) The Secrets That We Keep- Fall Apart, Then Start Again

Author: Tamara

Summary: It's far from the end for him.

Rating: PG-13/R (?)

Pairings: Grace/Tad, mentions of Grace/Eli

Disclaimer: Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't own a damn thing, so you can't sue.

Distribution: Anywhere else: Want. Ask. Take.

Feedback: My darlings you all are so wonderful, so please keep it up. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your kind words. They are my motivation.

Storylines: 6 months after Part II. Once again, no set point of view.

****

The Secrets That We Keep- Fall Apart, Then Start Again

"Cause it's all in my head.

I think about it over and over again

And I can't keep picturing you with him

And it hurts so bad

Cause it's all in my head

I think about it over and over again

I replay it over and over again

And I can't take it…"

- "Over and Over Again"- Nelly and Tim McGraw

She stood there, in the center of the room, smiling, laughing, and giggling, completely oblivious to the fact that his attention was completely drawn to her. Just like it always was. And yet she never seemed to notice. Or she just didn't give a damn. Which one, he couldn't decide. But he continued to observe her.

She looked simply radiant in her full length, white Matron of Honor dress. Her shoulders and collarbones exposed due to the fact it was a strapless dress. It made him remember all the nights he kissed her there, placing light kisses along her collarbones, and gently nipping at the area between her neck and shoulders. He silently cursed himself and leaned up against the post that supported the white tent where the reception and wedding were being held.

Her hair, which had grown longer, had been swept up into a French twist, with just a few small wisps that were slightly curled, framing her luscious face. Her eye makeup had been kept simple, while her lips were painted a glossy red. They were almost the color they had been after he would kiss her intensely and passionately.

"Just fucking stop, Eli. You're going to drive yourself mad," he told himself. Truth be told, he already felt like he had lost it. Actually, he did lose it…the day she ended it. He had spent the whole night crying and wallowing in self-pity, thinking of a million and one ways to alleviate his pain. Nothing had genuinely appealed to him, so he locked himself in his room and avoided anyone for as long as he could.

Eli let out a deep sigh, and he glanced back over at her and he felt his body tense up when he saw the dark-haired young man walk up and brush her lips with his. He clenched one fist while he consumed the entire flute of champagne he had been holding in one long gulp.

Tad wrapped his arms around her waist, and held her close while he was engrossing in conversation with Jessie, Grace, and Judy, and much to Eli's dismay all three women were completely charmed by him. Eli could feel his jealousy start to swell inside and decided he couldn't watch anymore. He had seen enough the last 6 months.

"Look at them. I don't think I've ever seen Grace so happy," Jake spoke as he stood next to Eli before Eli could excuse himself from the celebration. " She deserves it."

"Yeah, she does" Eli agreed, but with a slight edge to his voice. He only hoped Jake wouldn't notice.

"He's a good kid too," Jake added.

"Aren't they all," Eli added sullenly. Jake looked at him with an odd expression on his face. Clearly something wasn't right, and he wanted to know what it was, especially if it concerned Grace and her boyfriend.

"What was that supposed to mean?" Jake questioned.

"That I want to kill the little shit," Eli thought to himself. Hmm, maybe he could use this conversation to his advantage.

"Oh, nothing really. I mean all guys are the same, ya know? Sure the kid seems great, but he just seems….too great. Too perfect of a guy. And there is no such thing as a perfect guy. Believe me, I know," Eli explained, hoping maybe there was a shred of doubt about the kid in Jake's mind.

"Do you know something that I don't?" Jake asked as he grabbed two more glasses of champagne, handing one to Eli.

Eli smiled slightly. "No. Guess I'm just doing the protective older brother thing. Grace is special, and I just don't want her to get hurt."

Jake smiled at his answer. It was nice to know someone else was looking out for his little girl.

"You're right, Grace is special. And no one is good enough for her. No one ever will be. But if she's happy than I guess I can live with that. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to find my bride," Jake said as he excused himself to find Tiffany.

"Congratulations Jake, and give Tiffany my love."

"Will Do. See you later, Eli." Jake left leaving Eli alone to endear himself in his own private misery once more. He surveyed the scene before him, suddenly felt out of place. Couples were dancing to lame love songs, and people mingling socially with one another, and here he stood by himself. He decided it was time to snap himself out of it, and at least try and enjoy what was supposed to be a joyous occasion.

He walked up to the group of women and "the boyfriend," as he liked to call Tad. The first person he looked at was Grace, and he could see her becoming slightly unnerved causing herself to pull closer to her boyfriend. Eli only flashed his smile in response knowing how much Grace loved his smile. She had told him so herself.

"Good evening ladies," he said cheerfully. 'Tad," he acknowledged with a less than thrilled tone to his voice.

"Eli," he acknowledged, his tone matching Eli's when he addressed him.

Just then Lily came up to Jessie, Zoey, Judy, and Grace and informed them they were needed for wedding pictures.

"I'll be right back," Grace said to Tad, pulling him close and kissing him passionately for a few seconds. "Don't you go anywhere," she commanded him, her voice a low whisper almost seductive.

"I wouldn't dream of it," Tad replied with a grin on his face. Grace stole a quick glance at Eli, and walked away. She couldn't help but notice the look on Eli's face she walked away. It looked like one of annoyance. But she knew him better than that. It was a look of anger, and Grace silently prayed that both men would behave themselves.

"Why don't you run along and go play. You're not needed here," Eli said to Tad once Grace was out of sight.

Tad chuckled and smirked. "Nah that's okay. Grace _wants_ _me_ here," he shot back and held back a laugh as he saw Eli's face sour. Surely Eli didn't think that Tad knew, but Grace had told him. It had taken a lot out of her, but she trusted him enough to tell him everything. And he was the only other person besides Eli and Grace that had known what went on. She had been afraid because of what he might think of her if he knew, but to her surprise Tad had reassured her that he didn't think any differently of her. Surely he had been shocked, but he had gotten over it. He had fallen in love with Grace and that's all that mattered. Eli was her past and he was her future.

Eli composed himself, not catching on to what exactly it was that Tad was trying to say. But he had been caught off guard by Tad's nonchalant response to his comment.

"Look kid let's get one thing straight. I don't like you. You're not good enough for her," Eli said as all his anger and jealousy came spewing out, and his tone was clearly threatening.

Tad decided by instead of making a comeback he would bait Eli for all he could.

"Why not? Why don't you like me? Why am I not good enough for her?"

Eli wanted to shout at that it was because Tad wasn't him, but Eli knew he wasn't good enough for her either. But instead he simply answered:

"I just don't like you. And no one is good enough for her."

"You mean no one who isn't _you,_" Tad shot back, now standing face to face with the other man, yet trying to maintain a certain distance so onlookers wouldn't realize the intense conversation that had indulged themselves on.

"What the hell did you just say?" Eli asked incredulous. There was no way this kid had figured it out. Damn him if he had. Eli surely hoped no one else saw what was evident. But he and Grace had been avoiding each other like the plague. Well she had anyways. They barely even spoke two words to each other in the last few months. Then something hit him. No, there was no way in hell that had happened.

Eli's eyes widened in realization.

"That's right Eli. I know. I know all about you two. Didn't think she would tell me, did you? Well she did. Now you listen to me. I know how bad you hurt her, about all the other girls, the promises you made her and never kept. I'll be damned if you even try and get close to her again. I won't let you hurt her in any way, shape, or form. I love her and _she loves me_. You can't have her. She doesn't want you," Tad said as he temper was starting to take over. He knew Eli wanted her back. He knew Eli loved her, even is she hadn't known it. He could see it in Eli's eyes every time he looked at Grace, and the thought that she had loved Eli killed him. Even is she claimed she didn't anymore, Tad knew subconsciously it was still there.

"Nice try kid. Not bad. But who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself?" Eli mocked. He was amused at the kid, but he had to give the kid credit. He had guts. But something in the way Tad had spoken had suggested that Tad doubted how much Grace was really over him. Perhaps it wasn't as lost a cause as he had previously thought.

"Just stay away from her," Tad commanded not bothering to Eli's question.

"That's up to Grace," Eli replied, now realizing he was standing to close to Tad. To others it probably looked as if the two were ready to face off.

"If _you_ hurt her, I'll fucking kill you," Eli warned and he backed away as he saw Grace in the distance. With those parting words, Eli left Tad to silently scold Eli as he stood by himself.

a

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An hour and a half later, Eli found himself dancing with his little sister in the middle of the makeshift dance floor. Jesse, always full of life, was trying to lighten his clearly dark mood by telling lame jokes and reminiscing about childhood memories. Eli managed to crack a small, but forced smile. He heard Jessie sigh deeply, and wished that she didn't know him as well as she did.

"What's going on with you?" Jessie inquired.

Eli said nothing and threw a quick glance in the opposite direction. But Jessie followed the direction of his lingering eyes. She should have known.

"What did you expect, Eli? For her to wait around forever for you to tell her you loved here?" Jessie asked her brother in an almost reprimanding tone.

"Jess, I, uh…God I don't fucking know. I guess I did expect for her to wait until I was ready," he finally admitted to himself.

"That's pretty selfish, Eli. Grace and I might not be the best of friend's, but I do know that you can't make her wait an eternity for you to tell her you love her. You hurt her, and I mean really hurt her. And it wasn't just holding back those three words, but it was the girls, the partying, everything. Why did it take you so damn long?"

"Because I was scared. I mean what if I didn't really love her? What if I just thought I loved her, and thought she loved me? What if it wasn't real? I couldn't go through that again," Eli told his younger sister with the best explanation he could. One answer. Fear. Fear of loving her and then the fear of that ending and being hurt _again. _He couldn't go down that road again.

"Grace isn't Carla. She is nothing liker her, and she never will be," Jessie reminded her brother. She looked back to the corner where Grace and Tad had occupied and were kissing intensely. A part of her wanted to reprimand Grace for flaunting her relationship with Tad in front of Eli. But at the same time her brother partially deserved it. Maybe not months for months on end, but at least know he understood how she felt when she learned of him all the other girls.

"What tangled webs we weave," she murmured. Her brother now stood beside her and was watching intently. She wondered if he liked to torture himself.

"What was that?" Eli asked not able to understand her inaudible words as he finally tore himself away from the sight before him.

"Nothing. Don't worry about it." Jessie studied her brother and for the first time she really saw how tormented he was over Grace. But there was something in his eyes that was cautioning her. He looked far away in thought.

"Eli what are you thinking?"

"Just about how I fucked up, how much I love her, how much I want to kill the smug little asshole."

"First of all, it's good that you see that you messed up. Everybody makes mistakes. I know you love her, and you have for a long while. Even before Carla," Jessie informed her brother who met her with a raised eyebrow as if to question her last statement. "Please Eli, I'm not blind. You've liked her from day one, and you know it. Look Eli, you're my brother and I love you. Yes you messed up, but I know you. Deep down you really are a good guy, you just have a hard time showing it sometimes. And when you love someone you love them unconditionally. You deserve someone like Grace."

"No I don't, Jess."

"Yes you do. She's good for you. And someday, sooner or later, you'll have her back. I'm not saying it will be easy, but you will. I know it. You two were meant to be together."

"I'm not so sure about that," he said sadly voicing his doubts. He honestly didn't believe she would ever forgive him.

"If it was meant to be, it'll come back around. Until then, Eli, please for the sake of yourself, stop dwelling on the past and look to your future. Get yourself and your life together. I don't know how much more I can take of this brooding Eli."

Eli knew Jessie was right. If he wanted Grace back he had to change. He had to show her he changed, or he would never stand a chance. However the was still one small little obstacle that would stand in his way no matter how much he changed.

Eli looked back and saw Grace and Tad leaving hand in hand. "You're right, Jess. And I think I know just were I need to start…"

Jessie knew instantly what that meant. "I didn't mean break them up Eli. As much as I hate to say it, she really does care about Tad and she is happy. If you do anything to ruin that she'll hate you and you'll lose her forever."

Eli smiled and kissed Jessie's forehead. "No worries kid. I didn't say _I_ was going to break them up. Thanks for the talk. Love you," he said as he walked away.

And Jessie just stood there wondering what the hell her brother meant and was planning. Whatever it was wasn't going to turn out pretty. And she had a feeling it would be her brother who was going to lose.

FIN

Ok guys, it wasn't the best, but I needed a part to set up more of the story. I apologize for my sporadic and lack of updates, but a lot has been going on, and I'm hardly home anymore. Sorry this one was kind of boring. But thanks for reading.

Oh, and on a side note the guy who plays "Tad" is James Lafferty who plays "Nathan Scott" on _One Tree Hill._


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